Does anyone else seem to go through more intense transformations whilst *during that time of the month*?.
For me personally this month, even chocolate isn’t covering it like the usual sweet band aid it normally is. Which is slightly weird as Easter Egg season is almost upon us.
Normally it would be comfy jeans, chocolate grazing & lounging around on the sofa.
This past week…….
Tidalwaves of emotions & headaches along with moments of uncertainty & self doubt blurred into a whirlwind tsunami which i often thought would drag me down to the abyss of depression at times.
Trying to navigate the branches of Spirituality (this weeks focus has been starting shadow work, breaking down old behaviours & patterns) whilst balancing the Aunt Flo hormones.
Yeah, not easy.
I thought i was going to break lastnight before work (started a new job this week & felt drained yesterday i nearly called in). But thankfully I’m working alongside a good friend & she kept an eye on me. By the end of the shift, i felt the nausea & heaviness go.
Then an hour after i got home, the mild fever came back & so did the headache. I didn’t sleep in my own bed lastnight as i couldn’t get comfy. A restless night’s sleep followed.
Today i woke up & decided to break that cycle of behaviour (eat, relax, nap when i feel to, realise, release & let go of the feelings that popped up over the last few days).
I forgot i was in that phase of the month.
I’m my harshest critic & judge.
I don’t need anyone to kick my arse, i can do that myself.
But I’m realising that sometimes, i do need someone to pick me up again, give me a cuddle & tell me “it’s ok to feel & it’s ok to cry”.
Someone to remind me like a gentle whisper………..
“You’re going to be ok”.
“You can & you will make it through this”.
The weird thing is……….
When I’m experiencing low emotions, I isolate from those beautiful amazing BEings (you all know who you are).
When in reality, i should allow myself to open up & cry amongst them.
For so long (so many years). Apart from 2 loved ones in my life who have passed on, i relied on myself to get through things. So much pressure to push through & “just get on” with things.
I’m now realising on this Spiritual Awakening Journey, some things i won’t be able to navigate & go through on my own. I can’t isolate myself & go on an Absent Without Leave mission when I’ve got no idea where I’m going or what I’m meant to be doing. Even if my Ego is saying “jump in & figure things out later”.
I need my friends & i need my soul siStars. This world is dark enough at times & we don’t have navigate life alone.
Don’t be afraid to reach out & speak to someone “Hey, I’m struggling. Can you help/listen/advise/offer guidance?”.
If you follow me on Instagram. Feel free to reach out if you feel to.
The world can feel like a dark & lonely place at times. Please reach out to someone if you feel to.
You’re not alone.
Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.