I Need Poem 16/02/2023

No ones there anymore.
Those who were, are gone.
I’ve tried so hard to keep my head up & remain strong.
The truth is I’m breaking.
Piece by piece.
During each angry word.
Even when I speak my mind.
My voice is never heard.

I give advice & genuinely care.
But when it comes to my own self help.
I’m normally the last 1 there.

Truth is.
Today I need a cuddle.
I need someone to comfort me.
Whilst I shed these silent tears, which have been building up inside me.
I need someone to listen.
Not brush me to 1 side.
I need someone to console me, because I’m breaking down inside.

I’m searching for the teaching, from a lesson which was learned.
I’ve tried so hard to break this cycle.
Yet I keep taking the wrong turns.

Inside I yern for someone.
Who actually shows he cares.
Not someone who always makes empty promises.
I need someone to walk beside me.
On this journey we call life.
I need someone to know me.
Know me deeply from the inside.
Someone who I can talk to.
Without walking on eggshells.
Someone I can be honest with.
Not stress me all the way to Hell.

Right now I really need a cuddle and some peace.
Because if this cycle isn’t broken.
I fear I will lose me.

Deep into depression.
The solitude & woe.
Back to a place I promised myself, I would never go.

So if you can’t hold me.
Please hold me in your thoughts.
Because right now I’m in battle mode.
And I’m fighting for a good cause.
I’m fighting for myself.
I’m standing my ground.
Although at times I may fall.
I’ll never surrender or bow out.
I’m fighting for my voice, my dignity & my heart.
I’ve wasted so much energy rowing with a miserable old fart.

So I’m chucking away a long term relationship.
One which long ago was happy but up til now has turned toxic.
My heart can’t take the stress.
My mind can’t grief.
My body can’t take the heartache.
And I really do need sleep.

So forgive me if I’m absent.
Forgive me if I drift.
I’ve got alot which needs shifting now.
Before my mind goes amiss.

I really need a cuddle.
A cuppa tea & some peace.
Because right now I’m fighting.
And I’m fighting for ME.

©KM2023