Hey, Welcome Back Blog 21/05/2022

It’s weird that i knew the blog title before writing the blog 😆

Over the last few months I’ve had dreams.

Dreams where I’ve met people from my past.

Unawakened me years ago would see it as a sign to reach out to the person.

A majority of the time, it backfired & i found out that they didn’t need me.

However since my Spiritual Awakening Journey I’ve realised that…….

Sometimes people we encounter in dreams are actually messages.

For example………

I had a dream about 1  of my cousins lastnight. In the dream the cousin said they didn’t like me & in the dream i took offence. However i also remember saying to them in the dream that they didn’t know me.

I woke up & done a bit of research. I discovered that the dream meaning was that there was a part of my personality that i had struggled with. A part of me that i repressed for a long time.

In regards to the cousin years ago when we were growing up. We used to make songs up, listen to music videos & copy down the lyrics (Enrique Iglesias- Hero. Song springs to mind).

In the past i did reach out to the said cousin. Nope they didn’t need me & that’s cool.

I was also reminded of how at the beginning of the week i felt abit jealous towards someone. Thoughts of wishing i had what they had (a house).

I came to the conclusion about the dream…….

At some points in my life, someone might of been jealous of me (i was a spoilt brat during my childhood years & i remember a family member telling me a story of it).

I feel there’s a link to the dream & past old behaviour (possible shadow work/healing that needs to be done/looking into).

In the dream i was also singing (& I’ve forgotten the song 😅).

Coming forward………

I’ve also had dreams of people & i didn’t reach out.

I had a dream about someone a few months ago.

I didn’t reach out to them but i had a feeling that they might get back in touch soon.

I let the universe do as it does.

Funnily enough we got back in touch today.

I’ve healed a few aspects of myself (past & present) over the years/months & i feel I’m at that stage where i can heal others on their divine paths.

I know Who I AM.
I’ve Fully Embraced Who I AM.
And I AM ready to help/heal others.

There’s a saying that goes (pops into my mind)……..

Once a healer has healed themselves, they go onto heal others.

Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.


Spiritual BEing Blog 12/05/2022

Everyone wants a Spiritual Woman/Men……….


* We notice your Ego & refuse to play games. Sometimes we might mirror your behaviour back to you, to give you a taste of your own medicine.

Don’t like what your served back?.

Simple- Evolve!.

* We notice your tone first & formost whilst you speak.

* We can sense how you’re feeling.

* We set firm boundaries.

* We won’t have sex with you if you’re vibe is low (why be granted access to a sacred temple if you can’t worship the Divine Goddess/Divine Feminine) same works for the Divine God/Divine Masculine.

* We won’t put up with your shit. We know the Universe has our backs 10000000% so if we walk away from you, we know someone who TRULY deserves us is waiting for us just around the corner.

* We aren’t afraid to be alone as we know we are never fully alone (angels, guardian angels, archangels, loved ones in Spirit, Universe).

* We are guided.

* We may work with the elements.

* We are divinely protected.

* Great Mother Gaia is our home.

* We understand every being has a soul from the tiniest seed to the tallest tree. From every land mammal to the beings in the sea.

* We have gifts (some maybe in the stages of uncovering them).

* We are Sovereign.

* The version you may remember of us in the past no longer exists. We are always changing, growing & evolving.

* We let go of what no longer resonates/serves us. It maybe people, it maybe items. Anything that no longer sits well within us is simply wished well & let go of.

* Some may find solitude in- Music, writing, nature, meditation, art, creating food, being alone, spiritual practices etc.

* We are all unique.

* We are all beautiful divine sovereign BEings.

* We are Powerful.

* We are love.

* We are ONE.

Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.


It All Starts Within Blog 07/05/2022

Whilst driving home today, i had a thought pop into my head.

5D is a state of BEing.


You are the Seed from the Stars.

Reincarnated on Great Mother Gaia to grow, change & Evolve.

In doing so as you change, so too does the world around you.

It all starts Within.

Trust yourself.

Let your divine intuition guide you.

May you shine love & light wherever you go.

BEcome who you came here to BE.

You are Beautifully Unique, Strong & Wise.

There are a billion stars in the night sky shining at night.

There are a billion amazing bright BEings (you’re 1 of them) shining your beautiful divine sovereign light just by BEing.

To the beautiful sovereign soul reading this.

Keep going you AMazing BEautiful Sovereign BEing.

I AM so grateful to be Present at this time in humanity’s existence with you all.

Much love, light & blessings.

Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.


Fully Embracing Who I AM Blog 01/05/2022

Last few days I’ve been experiencing stomach aches (See the image regarding stomach pains from Julia Cannon’s Soul Speak book).

Yesterday i was having abit of a wobble (overthinking if i was a friend or just an acquaintance to someone in my life).

It reminded me of a chat i had with one of my soul sisters (K could tell & pick up on how i was feeling). K said she could feel that I’ve never felt accepted by people in/through times of my life.

Yes it’s true.

Growing up because my teeth aren’t straight i have had moments where i felt self conscious especially as the teen years hit (puberty). I remember going to hospital as a teen & the Dr/Dentist reviewing the mould of my teeth they had taken & saying “we will need to break her top jaw to fix it”. Jaw surgery.

I remember what i thought at the time “why do i wanna look like everyone else?”.

A few years ago i went to an orthodontist & was actually considering the braces route (£4,000).

I was back looking into jaw surgery this week on social media & discovered it’s a major surgery. It’s a long process of braces, appointments & a long healing process. Maybe one day i will go ahead with it. Then again maybe one day i won’t.

Looking back at those moments now I’ve realised 15year old me had a lot of fire within her. She already knew her own mind & what she wanted. She just never knew (teen years following the crowd. Go figure 😅).

I woke up today.

Looked in the mirror.

18years on.

I was amazed.

My body looks amazing.

I love my muffin top belly.
I love my stretch marks & my ever evolving changing body.
I love that I’m a size 14 with a wobbly belly & backside.
I love my height (I’m 5ft fun size 😆).
My shiny hair & hair colour (think my hair dying days are over).
I even love the odd white hair that has been popping through.
The way my immune system works & how it fights/works every second of the day to keep the body safe & healthy.
The way my body clears toxins & toxic crap from my system (even though being sick isn’t a nice feeling 😅).
How amazing my body is at feeling vibrations (& avoiding negative people 😅).

I love how through since being a little baby to these present moments, through the ups & downs of this crazy incarnation into this life.

My body has supported me.
My body has adapted.
My body has evolved.
My body has healed.
Despite the ups & downs of emotions/thoughts/feelings.

My body fat keeps me warm in the winter.
My skin heals from cuts & grazes.
My teeth aren’t straight yet i still smile & make others around me happy just by BEing me.
My cycle let’s me know how my hormones & body are doing each month.
Just by hugging/cuddling someone my heart can talk to another’s heart.
The changing colour of my finger nail bed let’s me know how my health is (research how/ways the nails can show how healthy the body is).

I’m in my early 30s & I AM fully Embracing Who I AM.


I have come along way in my life (i haven’t been a saint & i haven’t been a sinner).
I’ve been a bitch in a few chapters yet I’ve also been a friend in a few other chapters.

I realised today that it wasn’t about being accepted by others that was causing the spiritual stomach ache the last few days. It was the fact that i wasn’t fully accepting myself. That’s why the emotion was popping up & manifesting into the body. During this spiritual journey, I’ve learnt the body speaks & we only need to listen.

Let’s not forget we also went through a partial lunar eclipse lastnight (30th April 2022).


Who you have been.
Who you are.
Who you are becoming.

You’re gonna do amazing things.

You’re unique.

There’s only 1 of you.

Keep going.

Be Blessed.

Love & Light.

Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.


Grateful Moments Blog 29/04/2022

Noticed a few moments that made me smile over the last few days.

I was out shopping & i heard an elderly couple talking.

They were talking about honey.

The wife said she needed to get some with some jam.

And her husband replied that he’d already put it in the trolley.

He held onto the shopping trolley & was walking beside her. I thought it was really sweet to still be in love all those years with one person & their sweet little conversation about honey & jam.

Another moment was when i saw an elderly couple parking their car. The husband got out of the car to make sure he was forward enough in the parking space. And was very careful not to hit any cars beside him whilst opening his car.

A little toddler blowing raspberries at everyone she saw whilst shopping & helping her mum & dad put the shopping on the till conveyer belt.

Looking at your wageslip & it being more than you expected.

Cuddles with loved ones.

Speaking to people you look up to & getting sound advice.

Playing with musical instruments & feeling like a kid again by creating music.

Talking to a friend & popping to the shops after work at 10pm for a few bits from Tesco (& not sticking to the shopping list 😅).

Growing a herb garden on the windowsill for the 1st time & seeing them slowly emerge from the soil 😍.

Watching little ones copy you after you do something silly 😆.

Admiring the new day & feeling grateful for all you have & the one’s closest to you 💖🌎🙏🥰😊

It’s the little things that matter.

I AM Grateful.

Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.


What A Week Blog 28/04/2022

Wow what a week.

This week I’ve found myself setting boundaries, observing my own behaviour & triggers. Also I’ve found this week i have a very low tolerance for negative vibes, behaviours & frankly BullSh!t in general.

I’ve found myself in a few situations this week when i was like “no, i ain’t taking that BS anymore from so & so.” So i decided to set a boundary & mirror it back.

The individual didn’t like it (and this time i wasn’t feeling guilty for what came out of my mouth) instead i was in the frame of mind of Fuck it…….. let’s see how you like being spoken to like crap for no reason (i made sure my tone was also setting a boundary as i spoke as to make it clear i won’t be spoken to like a door mat by anyone ever again).

I didn’t go into a full blown rage. It was more of a firm storm.

Normally if i found myself in this sort of situation I’d feel guilty after then go into people pleasing mode.

Just because you’re a relation doesn’t give you dominance/authority to treat me like crap. Quite frankly my current mood is Bye Bye see ya in a few months. I’m not feeling guilty which shocks me & in a weird way i guess I’m done trying to fix certain relationships in my life (especially when it’s normally 1 sided. Like someone starts a row, you stand your ground, then you’re made out to be the instigator who started it.) Narcissist behaviour *no thanks*. I guess that’s why i don’t feel guilty for walking away.

Whether friend, family or random stranger. I’ve realised this week I’ve let alot slide for so many years & now i find myself in a frame of mind/state of BEing where whatever doesn’t resonate (mainly people’s shitty behaviour, unasked for opinions & criticisms etc) i won’t be tolerating anymore.

By all means love & light to you. No negative vibes or attachments. I will just walk away & won’t be back (quite frankly).

I had an eye opener moment this week where i realised old emotions were popping up to the surface to be acknowledged & healed. I didn’t understand why i was feeling the emotions i was feeling considering i was in a chilled mood when i woke up. I found myself crying in the shower by mid morning but by mid afternoon i was feeling happy & i had a clearer understanding of why the low emotions popped up mid morning (mainly due to overthinking, trying to control a situation & thus triggering anxiety) those old feelings popped up to be acknowledged & healed. I was happy, chilled & in a sombre/mellow mood by the afternoon.

I’ve noticed this week people have been coming to me for help, a chat & advice. I’ve been actively listening & also observing (so i don’t pick up on any energies which aren’t my own).

I’m also feeling really determined in certain areas of my life. I’m really determined to get on a college course before the course starts in September (i know September is 5 months away) but I’m really eager to get a place & then hopefully make a career out of it.

I’m also being more open with those closest to me & asking for help if I feel old behaviours/patterns are surfacing (i used to isolate myself from people & sort things on my own whenever i was feeling low). Now whenever I’ve seen those patterns surfacing instead of closing myself off, I’ll reach out.

As the saying goes……..

Even healers need healing.

I hope your week is going well.

Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.


Babygirl Poem 27/12/2021

*I wrote this on 27/12/2021. I’ve been deciding whether to publish & i feel now is the right time. I Love You (hopefully you know who you are).*

Not sure how i feel today.
At a crossroads of holding on, or letting you walk away.
We’ve been here many times before.
A bond we once had, now seems no more.
Bonded at birth.
I love you so much I’d of given you the Earth.
An anxious mother, stuck between empathy & discipline.
She often broke down, from deep within.
So many voices from people, telling her what to do.
When really she should of just been herself, when she was with you.
You never got to see me behind the boundaries that were set.
The rows i hope, you’ll someday soon forget.
I wish you could see, how much you really mean to me.
But i guess that’s up to destiny.
Maybe one day you’ll come back.
Maybe one day we can work on things & get back on track.
I hope one day, when your a mother.
I hope you listen to your inner voice above another.
You’re so full of fire & grace.
I know you won’t make my mistakes.
You’ll be calm, you’ll be clear.
You won’t the anxiety run around in the air.
You’ll be firm & always kind.
You’ve always known, your own beautiful mind.
Head strong, brave & true.
I will always love you.
The way you stand your ground & speak your truth.
The way your smile, lights up a room.
How you are, both inside & out.
I’m so very proud of you, my babygirl.
Children grow up & spread their wings.
It’s a way of life’s, one of many things.
I can’t hold on forever, that much is true.
But always know this………
You x


Facing Fears From Years Gone By Poem *E* 22/04/2022

*This poem is about someone very special to me. A part of my heart that was taken long ago. You’ve never got to see the real me due to me feeling vulnerable. I admit I haven’t been the best & there will always be memories i wish i could go back & change. I’m facing my biggest fear now (although I went through that fear when you left the first time, all those years ago) back then i didn’t think I’d make it (I’ve never told you that part of the story). That’s a tale for another time. I will always love you that will never change.*

So Farewell my darling, I’ll miss you.
I never intended to, en-cage you.
All i ever wanted was to, protect you.
By setting boundaries, but that just enraged you.
I understand more now, than i did back then.
Back when you were growing, into a little person.
I tried so hard, to keep you safe.
When in hindsight i should of listened, & given you space.
Space to grow, freedom to breathe.
Instead of thinking i knew better, now you wanna leave.
There’s so much, i wish i could tell you.
Show you who i really am, tell you how much i love you.
For so many years, I’ve hidden my inner scars.
In doing so the pain i felt, kept us part.
You saw a stranger, not the real me.
You saw a person, addicted to authority.
Trying to do right, ended doing wrong.
The try-to-be perfectionist circle, kept going on & on.
Years go by, my feelings never change.
I’ll always love you, despite some pain.
Pain from the past, from what happened & what was said.
Years of depression, anxiety & stress.
Sometimes, you saw me at my worst.
I know I’ve said somethings, that must of hurt.
I’m sorry for all, what was said & done.
There’s 2 sides to a coin, you’ve only heard one.
One day when you’re older, hopefully we’ll sit down.
I’ll share with you your beginning, into this crazy world.
I’ll open up my old wounds, my heart to you.
I’ll allow who i once was, to be shown to you.
The woman who tried so hard to keep you safe.
The woman who was hurt, in a few nasty ways.
One thing will always ring true.
The day that test came back positive & I knew I was expecting you.
So much joy & excitement that followed.
You have been loved from the start, that was never for-shadowed.
My brave beautiful headstrong babygirl.
You’re a fierce shining light, in this sometimes dark world.
They say time heals, atleast it’s meant to.
Maybe this time apart, will help us both renew.
I really didn’t wanna do this, I’ve feared it for so many years.
Thinking of it then & now, never lessens the tears.
I knew one day, you’d wanna go your own way.
There was always a fear, of you never wanting to see me.
I’m finally facing it now, & it hurts like a bitch.
Like a torn in your side, that constant twitch.
I know wherever you are, you’re gonna be ok.
I hope our paths, cross again someday.
I will always love you, that will never change.
Who I AM protects you, in many different ways.
You have always been divinely protected, precious young one it’s true.
Wherever you are, whatever you do.
My heart will always, be with you.
May you grow strong, brave & true.
May your dreams take wings, & your horizons always be baby blue.
I have loved you ALWAYS My Babygirl.


Past, Simply BEing & Future Blog 17/04/2022

This weekend.

I’ve travelled back 10years. To a time where i thought i wouldn’t make it (old wounds & past pain resurfaced).

I went back to my childhood years reminiscing about old childhood shows i used to watch. To name a few.

*Get Your Own Back.
*The Queen’s Nose.
*The Wild House.
*Fun House.
* Bodger & Badger.
*The Animals of Farthing Wood.
*Disney & Jim Henson’s Dinosaurs.
*Art Attack.
*Crystal Maze.

I’ve also been working on my future (working on my counselling course assessment 2 answers for the course).

I’m currently sat on my bed listening to old tunes (music) from an old mp3 player that’s atleast 10years old & singing along to the music.

I’m not torturing my soul with all the shit i didn’t do right from my past (shoulda, woulda, coulda’s).

I’m not worrying if I’m gonna pass my counselling course or if I’ve added enough information to the answers section.

Today in this moment I AM BEing.

And right now,
In this moment,
BEing is enough.

Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.


And So She Let Go Blog & Poem 13/04/2022

I’ve learnt alot this past week.

One of the big ones for me is……….

Letting Go.

I’ve reluctantly let go of trying to have my shit together & trying to control situations.

I’m done people pleasing & trying to fix relationships all the time.

I’m done going through the same old behavioural cycles of raised voices between 2 people trying to get their point across.

I’m done trying to justify my decisions & boundaries to people who are so committed to proving me wrong than actually actively listening to me.

People blindsided to my growth by old versions of me they hold close to them like they’re trying to hold power & dominance over me.

I’m done arguing & battling with people who are committed to me shutting my mouth, obeying & themselves being right all the time & acting high & mighty.

My own inner peace is more important to me than winning a poxy row between someone who is committed to misunderstanding me.

I’ve detached from alot of situations recently (mainly family). It’s not that i don’t care. It’s that I’m no longer interested in old behavioural patterns from both sides reoccurring. Clearly the way both sides have behaved repeatedly hasn’t proven a positive outcome has it?.

I’m done.

I’m no longer interested in old dramas.

Wanna be right all the time? Fine do so on your own.
Don’t wanna see me? Fine that’s cool i respect your divine free will.
Show up unannounced & expect me to jump when you could of called me beforehand? No that ain’t happening.

I AM no longer committing myself to people & situations that disrupt my inner peace & spiritual alot.

I know who has my back (my close friends & loved ones & my soul sisters) the people who actually see the Real Me.
They see the Real Me because there is no judgement & no criticism.
They accept me for who i am, support me, are telepathic when I’ve been isolating/distant for a while, they actively listen to me, they help me get back into alignment, they are firm yet supportive (no excuses, just growth 😊). They also give me a verbal kick up the bum when they notice old behaviours of mine resurfacing 😊. I can be open & feel in a safe place.

It’s very rare to find people you can feel openly comfortable talking to. Like a safe shelter from life’s storms. They have a way of bringing out the sunshine & rainbows after the storms of life.

These people are truly rare.
Truly unique.
Truly beautiful.

I have a few of these BEautiful Magnificent Magickal people in my life. Some of these people are spiritually awake & some aren’t. I still love them all the same.

I’ve gone off topic again 😅 so i will leave the blog like this………..

And so she acknowledged her past self.
Cradled & cuddled the old version she no longer was.
Hugged each old past behaviour & laid them gently in a wooden box.
Thanked them all for the lessons & closed the lid.
She looked to the Moonlit sky above.
And said.
Thank You for the lessons.
I AM ready for the blessings.
And so she let go…………
She let go gracefully & with gratitude.
For she was no longer who she once was.
Yet she was embracing whom she was yet to be.
Be Blessed.
Love & Light.

Wherever you are in the world/Great Mother Gaia. I hope you have a blessed day/night.


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